As we all take time off to reflect, think about your family, and those who have provided french fries for you in your life. Big ups to all of the potato farmers who have helped us get to such an auspicious occasion.
Finally, a place that’s doing their part to give back to the greater good. It makes you feel like you’re home again…because we all grew up in households that made french fries. It makes me really, really happy when fancier place care about their fries (and doesn’t overdo it). But freal, these were awesome- really simple, but really good: sea salt + fresh rosemary (that they grow there).
Neighborhood: Culver City
Hmmm. The random light cajunesque seasoning really makes these. I do like them, but they’re not the best, and they’re consistently not crispy. Ever. Wack city.
Do NOT order them to-go though- they get crazy limp/soggs.
A mini-rant on ordering fries to go; I don’t really know any place with good takeaway fries. Sadly most places don’t think about this- with a foam or plastic to go box, your fries are dead within 1-2 minutes of closure.
Those who throw them in paper bags are the smartest, but oddly, not that many do. There are thousands and thousands of fries that die everyday, and with your help, we can make a change. Please check out www.helpthefries.org for more info.
Ample side grease from being relatively close to amazing tempura-esque fried chicken: 5.0
These reminded me of legos. Legos didn’t taste good, nor were these fries brightly colored with bumps, but they were the most perfectly rectangular fries I’ve ever had. This is neither a good nor a bad thing, it’s just interesting to note. Believe me, a lot of people think this is interesting- I have like 2.5-3 readers now. So, Umami used to do this awesome thing where they’d pile up their steak fries like building blocks- but they no longer do it. They changed the fries/presentation. So shady/damn economy. They sort of make up for it with their BYOB policy. But, they fail on a couple levels;
1st fail: They only offer a house ketchup, with literally a spoon sized portion. Now a LOT of people have been emailing in asking me my take on this- I don’t like it at all. First off, if you’re going to only offer your house ketchup, give us more than a spoonful (you can ask for more but the service is consistently shitty). And second, at least make it good. It tasted fresh, but I wanted my heinz. There’s something about that sugary/fake taste that’s oh so right. I may or may not bring my own heinz with my booze next time.
2nd fail: They literally give you 9 fries.
3rd fail: They literally give you 9 fries. Seriously, fuck you guys. Since they don’t come with the burgers, this is portion you get when you order it as a side. A SIDE. There is no reason for this.
Oh yeah, the fries themselves- always crispy, super simple, nothing special. Well salted. Bastards.
Can we just sit back and take a moment to recognize the fact that all meals are greatly improved with fried goods of any kind? Seriously though. 8 words: French fry-encased hot dog on a stick. To some, nasty, to me, intriguing. Instead of making us reach down to take a break from eating the hot dog, on a stick (because that’s not convenient enough), you get the best of both worlds in one bite. Technology these days. This has nothing to do with 25 degrees, I just wanted to celebrate fried foods.
25 Degrees is money in the french fry bank. Just had thyme & sea salt, but the simplicity really complemented my drunken desires very nicely.
Here are 4 random french fry attributes that I am rating these fries on. I won’t average them out to get the final score. French fries should never be associated with math. Ever. I just felt like breaking it down.
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Pike Bar & Fish Grill
Neighborhood: Long Beach
If french frying was a sport, these would be definitely be mvp. If it was a video game, these would be Goldeneye 64. You get the point- they’re clutch. There are times when you just need french fries/salted goods, and those times are generally after 11pm, 5-6 drinks in. That’s when these work their magic. Simply seasoned with salt, they’ve got the crunch and the soft inners. As you can see, the chefs here use the Mitch Hedberg, “fuck it, slice ‘em up” logic, which results in an awesome french fry/potato wedge/circle hybrid.
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Hal’s Bar & Grill
YYYyeeeeeessssssssssssssssssssssssssssss. French fries, made from real potatoes.
It’s like In N’ Out, but doesn’t taste like potato chips/shit. These were a little limpy, even after asking for them well done, but I can see the potential. Super simple, but the oil they used gave it a great semi-unique flavor. I think that’s when you know a fry is good, when having them limp still tastes great. On Sunday and Monday nights they also have great jazz after 9. French fries + jazz is a commendable combo. Hal’s also offers, for like $2 extra, to add truffle oil to your fries. This in theory is very exciting (to me, and like 3-4 other people tops), but in reality is way too overbearing. Don’t get me wrong, I’m all about adding fungi from the Langhe area of the Piedmont region in northern Italy that costs $1300-2700/pound (wikipedia ftw) to my fries, but it just doesn’t taste that amazing after 2-3 fries. It’s sort of like Gilbert Godfried, a person who is entertaining for 2 minutes tops.